Friday, May 29, 2009 @ 2:22 AM
A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his neighbour, a Singh, came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. He opened it, looked inside, slammed it shut, and stormed back into his house.
A little while later, he came out of his house again, looking nervous, went to the mailbox, again opened it, and slammed it shut again.
Angrily, back into the house he went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here our Singh came again, looking very heated up. He marched to the mailbox, opened it and then slammed it shut harder than ever. Puzzled by his actions, the man asked him, 'Is something wrong?'
To which the ferocious Singh replied, ' There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps telling me I have mails in the mailbox!'
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A Singh was enjoying the sun at a nice beach in a neighbouring country. A lady came and asked him, 'Are you relaxing?' Singh answered, 'No, I am Banta Singh.'
Another guy came and asked him the same question. Singh answered, 'No, No, Me Banta Singh!'
Third one came and asked him the same question again. Singh was totally annoyed and decided to shift his place.
While walking, he saw another Singh soaking in the sun. He went up to him and asked, 'Are you Relaxing?' The other Singh was a lot more educated and answered, 'Yes, I am relaxing.'
The Singh slapped him on his face and said, Stupid, idiot. Everyone is looking for you and you are sitting over here!'
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A Singh died and went to heaven. When he got to the pearly gate Saint Peter told him that the new rules were in effect due to the advances in education on earth. In order to gain admittance, a prospective heavenly soul must answer two questions:
1. Name two days of the week that begin with 'T'
2. How many seconds are in a year?
The Singh thought for a few minutes and answered....
1. The two days of the week that begin with 'T' are Today and Tomorrow.
2. There are 12 seconds in a year.
Saint Peter said, 'OK, I'll buy the Today and Tomorrow answer, even though it's not the answer I expected. But how did you get 12 seconds in a year?'
The Singh replied, 'Well, January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd,
etc...'
Saint Peter lets him in without another word.
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Sardar Gurbachan Singh is appearing for his University final examination.
He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes his shoes off and throws them out of the window.
He then removes his turban and throws it away as well. His shirt, pant, socks and watch follow suit.
The invigilator, alarmed, approaches him and asks what is going on.
'Oye, I am only following the instructions yaar,' he says, ' it says here, 'Answer the following questions in brief.'
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Two Singhs were sitting outside a clinic. One of them was crying.
So the other asked him, 'Why are you crying?' He replied, 'I came here for a blood test'
The second Singh asked, 'So? Are you afraid?' He replied, 'During the blood test, they will cut my finger.'
Hearing this, the second Singh started crying like hell. The first one was astonished and asked him, 'Why are you crying?'
To which he replied, 'I have come for my urine test.'
